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Writer's pictureDr P K Gupta

Why Do Men Fall Asleep After Sex?

Ah, that was amazing, wasn’t it, my love?… Love… chubby… we lost it, doctor! He fell asleep… again, a common question raised by women in consultation with sexologist in DelhiWhy do men fall asleep after sex? It is not a lack of affection. There is a reason for that and it has nothing to do with insensitivity or disinterest in the partner. It is biological. Eight out of ten men fall asleep after sex, according to studies. There is no reason to feel bad, here we will tell you why men fall asleep after having sex.


This is the eternal complaint of women. Your partner has probably already told you something about it. Why instead of hugging her, continuing with the cuddling or starting a delicious chat after having sex, you surrender to the arms of Morpheus.


Needless to say, for them, this is a totally impolite, unromantic attitude; but men, most of the time, we can’t help it. After making love, the women recharge their batteries – we’ll also explain why – while the men get knocked out and even snore!


The answer to why men fall asleep after sex lies in hormones and brain chemistry. After experiencing an orgasm, a man enters a “recovery period”, a refractory period scientists call it. His heart has beaten faster, the blood has flowed through his body to reach the penis with force, the muscles have contracted and relaxed over and over again, trying to contain the ejaculation until the woman reaches the climax. That’s too much effort even for Superman! This is without taking into account that couples tend to have more sexual activity at night, after a long day at work, stress, traffic, and physical exhaustion. It is the hour when the body asks to sleep!


And what does science say in favor of gentlemen? The scientific website Live Science has published that during sex, the brain secretes hormones that induce sleep and make the body feel relaxed: serotonin, oxytocin, norepinephrine, vasopressin and nitric oxide; also, after an orgasm, the male body secretes prolactin, this is the main culprit of these “slights”, ladies, since it produces the feeling of satiety, so the desire disappears for a while. The body is wise, it turns out that prolactin levels rise during sleep to allow males to get ready for the next round.


Another reason why men fall asleep after making love is because oxytocin and vasopressin reduce stress, and here is a very nice fact: these chemicals promote feelings of attachment, trust, and love (this is why mothers and children they segregate them when they are together); hence the feeling of being more attached to the other person after having sex, explains sex specialist in Delhi.


After the erotic moment, melatonin is also present, a hormone whose main function is to regulate our biological clock for sleep. Have you heard of the circadian cycle? Circadian cycles or rhythms are physical, mental, and behavioral changes that follow a daily, repetitive pattern, and are related to light. Sleeping at night and being awake during the day is an example of this. Sleep patterns are determined by circadian rhythms. Our body produces melatonin at night. If we add to this the total relaxation the body enters, well, they can already be a little more understanding with their sleeping beauty.



For men to fall asleep after sex is so common that there are even books about it. One of them is Why do men fall asleep after sex?, Where authors Mark Leyner and Billy Goldberg claim that “physical exertion during sex and after climax depletes the muscles of energy-producing glycogen. This leaves men sleepy. As they have more muscle mass than women, they tend to get more tired after doing it than women”.


Such an assertion has not been scientifically proven. However, it is possible that there is a great loss of energy through ejaculation since this is literally an explosion of exhausting sensations. The journal Neuroscience & Behavioral Reviews published the results of an investigation stating that, after sex, the brain undergoes a change in its neural activity. The prefrontal cortex, the brain region where the state of consciousness is generated (not in a philosophical sense, of course, but physiologically), is deactivated after orgasm, that is why men – and according to this scientific explanation, also women – remain “Disconnected” from the world after a sexual love affair.


Here a very elementary question arises. If sex makes you sleepy, why don’t men fall asleep after masturbating? It occurs to us that self-stimulation can occur more frequently during the day, in that little time alone with oneself. We do not know if this is actually the case, what is known is that the brain secretes up to four times more hormones -particularly prolactin- during a sexual act with another person. This is the difference, explains the best sexologist in Delhi.


Do women also fall asleep after sex? 

What about them? Doesn’t it make them sleepy? If their brain chemistry is the same as men’s, why don’t they feel that uncontrollable desire to close their eyes and abandon themselves until the next day?


Of course, they relax and it also makes them sleepy… if they reached orgasm. It is no secret to anyone that men are more likely to climax than their partners, who often do not arrive, are low with desire or worse, pretend.


To understand what happens to women in the minutes after having sexual intercourse, we must know for them, sex is a more emotional matter, a surrender, the moment when they feel closer to their partner.


Unless they are tremendously tired after a long day of struggling with children, work, housework, and other problems, women often wish that the moment of intimacy and communion between them lasts. It is the ideal situation to openly talk about topics other than everyday ones, the occasion for cuddling, listening to sweet words, or even smoking a cigarette, as in French movies. For them, the “after-party” is as important as the previous games. They still have their adrenaline pumping, that’s why they feel the sexiest and most confident of themselves. On this basis, it is possible to understand her annoyance when the gentleman next door prefers to sleep. Don’t you have anything to say? Did you get bored? Did you just want that and now? Where is the love?


According to the top sexologist in Delhi, only 45% of women fall asleep after having sex (against 80% of men), the rest (55%) recharge batteries, they feel full of energy. This could be due to the multi-orgasmic capacity of women, they do not need a refractory period, they can continue asking for more even if the man is totally exhausted.


There are also studies (University of Michigan) that suggest that feminine nature is different from that of men. If a woman has rested properly, perhaps slept a little more than usual, she will be more receptive to sexual stimuli and may have up to 14% higher libido.


Knowing this, it is worth it that we go the extra mile to stay awake, don’t you think?


Now, not everything has to be disagreement and annoyance if men fall asleep after sex. To begin with, against human nature there is nothing else to do but accept it.


On the other hand, Aldright University (Pennsylvania) carried out an experiment whose results are surprising: falling asleep after a sexual encounter is a sign that love runs deep.


We said the results were “surprising”… If you’re frowning, we need to explain further.


Men and women feel basically the same after making love. We feel happy, relaxed, loved. It is a sensation similar to that of a child when it is in the arms of the mother; feels safe and calm.


Sharing a bed seems to be the greatest sign of trust in a couple. It is the place where we are most vulnerable. If we lived in the jungle, surrounded by predators, sleeping would leave us in a dangerous position, right?


“Sharing the dream” can have a very beautiful double meaning. After all, the bed is the place where we enter the world, the place where a new life is generated, where we dream, and say goodbye to our loved ones. It is not uncommon for the greatest bond between a couple, the most intense displays of affection, and the great conversations, to occur precisely there.


If it is right or wrong for men to fall asleep after sex, it will continue to be a discussion in which men and women may never agree. What we can do is see how important sex is for a full and happy life.


In order to enjoy an intense sexual encounter, we must let go of fears, worries, resentments and prejudices. Look at it like this, ladies and gentlemen: if your man falls asleep after sex, it is a matter of brain chemistry, from the effort to satisfy you but above all, because he knows that he is in the best place in the world, says sexologist doctor in Delhi.

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